Deciding whether to get an abortion is a life-changing decision and one that should not be taken lightly. You should receive advice from many different people. But why not listen to other young women who were in similar circumstances. Following are eight quotes from women who faced unplanned pregnancies and decided either to parent their child or place them in a loving adoptive family.
1. “A child is a blessing…”
This simple statement is #1 for a reason. This young mom I interviewed understands this about unplanned pregnancies. Our culture tends to view children as burdens, as expenses or as barriers on the way to success. But this single mom insists that even though there are struggles, her child has greatly blessed her life. Keep in mind that whatever circumstance you find yourself in, is not the baby’s fault. Your child will bless you regardless of your circumstance! Good things can come out of a bad situation. Be brave and hope for good things to come your way.
2. “I felt an instant connection”
One doesn’t need a study to show there is not only a physical connection between the unborn child and his mother in the womb but also an emotional connection, as well. Studies do show that an unborn child recognizes the voice of his mom, feels her joy and happiness as well as stress and trauma.
Far beyond the baby kicking or the physiological changes that take place during pregnancy, there is a connection between mom and her unborn baby. There is a definite connection.
3. “I loved him from the moment I knew I was pregnant”
There is an innate knowledge of a woman that she knows the fetus within her is alive. Body chemistry, emotional changes, physical changes is unlike anything she has gone through before.
4. “…I have a lot of support”
This young mom decided to keep and raise her baby even though she did not have support from the father. But she decided not to go it alone and surrounded herself with supportive people from her family and her friends and the faith community. Because of the support she receives her toddler is now thriving and happy and well cared for. Don’t go it alone! You are not the Lone Ranger! Whether it be the faith community or a Pregnancy Resource Center, or support from another woman who has experienced an unplanned pregnancy, surround yourself with people who will help you.
5. “Take it one day at a time”
Sometimes when we face crises, the problem in front of us seems so insurmountable that we cannot see a way around the problem. They may see the mountain, but not the road around the mountain. Women with unplanned pregnancies need to take one day at a time. Things will get better, like it did for this woman who found herself in an impossible situation. Take it one day at a time. An unplanned pregnancy is not the end of the world. There will be a tomorrow.
6. “I should have held the father more responsible”
Fatherlessness is a huge issue in this country. Children need two parents: A mom and a dad. Don’t get me wrong some of the best moms out there are single moms. But a boy going through puberty needs a man to help him get through those tough years. A young girl needs a father figure to show her kindness, compassion and true unconditional love. Sometimes fathers are let off the hook too easily and the burden placed on the mom alone. But far and above simply paying child support or being involved in his child’s life, abortion lets a father off the hook, big time. And enables him to continue the irresponsible behavior. Don’t let that happen.
7. “I got counseling, but needed more”
Get professional help. Sometimes the shock and stress of an unplanned pregnancy are enormous and sometimes unbearable. That stress filters down to the child. Sometimes it causes young moms to do things that are not logical: like not getting prenatal care or not telling anyone they are pregnant. Getting counseling from an objective source especially when depression presents itself. can help make sense out of what may seem like an impossible situation.
8. “I didn’t give up on my baby.”
What about rape, you ask? Shouldn’t a young woman who has been sexually assaulted have the right to abort that baby? I will answer your question with a question: “Why should a child pay the ultimate price because of the crime of her father?” Sexual assault is a horrible, life-altering event. But so is abortion. I interviewed a brave young lady who was raped. She decided not to abort but rather to place her blessing in a loving adoptive home. She is not alone in her decision. As a matter of fact, 75-85 % of all women who experience an unplanned pregnancy because of a sexual assault decide to bring their baby to term.
Don’t give up! If you keep your baby, you will be in the vast majority of women who chose the same thing. You have another human being who needs you and who is going to depend on you.
Bottom line is that there are many options when facing an unplanned pregnancy, not just one: keeping the baby and raising her yourself, allowing a relative to raise your child, or placing your child in an adoptive home are all viable choices.
For a perfect example of an effective, local Pregnancy Resource Center, click here.
